1. Making things sound unimportant by the use of language
The first of the 11 Ways Women Ruin And Sabotage Their Success is that women use words that will make them sound less important. Like using the word ”just.” ”I just wanted to stop you for a minute.” That simple word sends the subtle message that our statements and opinions aren’t that important.
This one sentence says it all! By using the words “just”, “I feel”, and stating that I may not have as much expertise as perhaps others do, I have reduced my credibility to almost zero! How many times have you heard women communicate this way? How many times have you yourself used this type of minimizing language? Exactly!
2. Unreasonable apologizing
Women in business are way too used to apologizing when there’s no reason to do so. Many women’s voicemail messages begin, ”I’m sorry I’m not able to take your call right now.” Even in our voicemail, we apologize!
Here are some of the most common unnecessary “sorry-moments” and examples collected:
• “I’m sorry, Jack, to interrupt. It’s time for your meeting, are you ready to chat? “. This is an unnecessary apology (you both agreed to that time slot, right?) It also shows a lack of confidence.
• “I’m sorry, I’ve got a question.” – Instead of, “I’ve got a question.” spoken with a positive attitude or a smile or decisive body language.
3. Desiring feedback or permission
The desire to “ask for permission” or “ask for feedback” is more often than not a form of resistance or a lack of self-trust. We don’t want to be too overpowering, and we want to get buy-in upfront. And we ask permission to say something when there’s absolutely no need to do that.
4. Seeking perfection
A lot of times when women get a new job offer or any new opportunity, women will feel like they need to be fully skilled before taking it on, while a man given the same opportunity will say, ‘It’s about time they picked me!’ Men will say, ‘I’ll take the job and figure it out when I get there.’ We all have moments of self-doubt that can be paralyzing, but wavering on decisions that affect your career can result in missed opportunities. Seeking perfection does not take you anywhere.
We know that saying “no” sounds very simple, but isn’t always easy in practice. Remember: a “yes” to one commitment is a “no” to something else. Own your “no’s” so you can love those yesses! Also we women think too much and we worry too much. At some point, you have to stop feeling so concerned about what people will think about you.
6. Going with the flow without having any goals
Obviously, we have mentioned this a thousand times on Women On Topp! You have to be really clear about what you want. Often women tend to just go with the flow because they don’t want to think of setting goals. Which is one of the reasons why we sabotage our success.
7. We only do things we know how to do
Stop worrying about whether if you are skilled or not, get over it and do something new. We always think we can’t do it, but we can! Women often don’t set any goals because they don’t know how to get there. Well, guess what! NO ONE does!
8. Vague boundaries
Women get easily distracted, one day they have a huge dream the next day they worry about their personal life. Well, you need to have boundaries and not get distracted from achieving your goals.
9. Getting distracted by useless things
Women tend to pay too much attention to little details for too long, versus seeing the bigger picture. That can make it hard for them to delegate and therefore prevents them from having the freedom to take on the next challenge.
10. Failing to build a personal brand
A strong personal brand will help you get what you want whether you’re working in a company or running one of your own. The way to develop a personal brand is to deepen your own self-awareness. What makes you stand out positively from other people?
A personal brand is an asset that defines the best things about you. It’s the impression people have of you, and the impression you want them to have.
11. Never joining in the team effort
Collaboration in the workplace can serve not only to brighten your day but can help to make employees more creative and productive.
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