When did Busy Become a Competition?

  • Published on:
    December 23, 2017
  • Reading time by:
    4 minutes

“I don’t care how busy I am – I will always make time for what’s most important to me.”~ Kevin Hart

Amidst the holiday bustle we all get lost in the shuffle. It’s almost as if we blink our eyes and all of December is gone. Before we know it Christmas has arrived. We unwrap the gifts, load the children into the car, drive an hour to our families, run in and help cook dinner. Than we wash the dishes, have coffee, share some old memories, load the children back into the car, drive back home and load them into bed. By than we are so exhausted that we can barely remove our own clothes before falling asleep. The next day we’re up and at it again. It’s almost as if the days run into each other. Days become months and than months become seasons. We have lost track of time and we are worse for it. To top it off we brag about how busy we are. It’s almost as if its an attempt to one up each other with our busyness.

When did BUSY become a competition?

As women, we have to fulfill multiple roles. The roles of mothers and wives, bosses, coworkers, therapists, daughters, car drivers, girl-scout troop leaders, grocery shoppers, cooks, friends and so many more than one person could count.  As the old adage says, “ A woman’s job is never done.” But really is the life of busy the life we want?

Somehow along the way the phrase being busy corresponded with being successful, being desired or simply being worthy. But being busy has become the opposite. Being busy prevents us from being in the present moment, and with that we lose the gift of today. We lose the ability to focus on the simplest task at hand.  As our mind is constantly seeking to check off items on our “to-do list.” Add to that the constant distraction of cell phones, email, social media, children, families and work obligations.  With all of this busyness its no wonder we have lost our ability to connect in the present moment.

Busyness results in exhaustion, depression, addiction, enhanced anxiety and the most important the loss of time. Therefore, the end result of busyness is not the result we desire to achieve. We need to stop glorifying busy and begin focusing on what us most important, the time at hand.

So how do we stop being busy?

Take a Digital Detox

Establish boundaries between you and your cellphone and computer. Set certain times when you are allowed to use them. Don’t allow them into your bedroom. This way they will not be the first thing you grab in the morning when you wake up. Leave them at the door when you walk in from work. This will allow you to be fully engaged when you see your family.  Remember that while cell phones provide instant gratification it is your family and loved ones that provide life long connection.

Volunteer

There is no greater way to be reminded of how lucky we are than to walk in the shoes of those who have less. When we give to others we gain a needed gift, an enhanced perspective. This perspective provides us with the reminder of what is important and what is not. Nothing will bring you clarity like volunteering.

Nurture your Soul

In order to give to others you must give to yourself. With this, you should spend more time doing what makes you happy. Start filling your “To-do list” with items that will make you smile. Take more breaks. Go for more walks. Say more thank yous. Open the door to loving more with less.

Spend More Time with Children

Spend more time with your children. If you don’t have any attempt to see the world through the eyes of a child. Spend more time playing: more time experiencing things for the first time. Less time thinking about repercussions of what would happen if you stepped away from your work for five minutes and more time in the moment filled with bliss.

Melissa Fino

Melissa Fino is a defiant high school dropout who went on to receive her Master’s of Social Work from the University of Southern California. Melissa applies her life experience with unexpected challenges and numerous insecurities to empower women to let go of the negative in their lives and embrace the positive. Currently, she is the CEO of LoveYourLife Community, a conscious life change coach for women, writer, blogger and speaker.

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