Friendship isn’t just about who you spend time with—it’s about who truly stands by you. While most articles will tell you that a real friend is someone who listens, supports you, and doesn’t gossip, the truth runs much deeper. Sometimes, the biggest signs of real friendship are found in the little, unexpected details. Read on How Do You Know When Someone Is a Real Friend or Not? 10 Unusual Signs to Watch For.
If you’re wondering whether someone is truly your friend, here are ten unique and surprising ways to tell.
How Do You Know When Someone Is a Real Friend or Not? 10 Unusual Signs to Watch For
1. They Respect Your “Invisible” Boundaries
A real friend doesn’t just respect the rules you say out loud—they also understand the unspoken ones.
For example:
- If they sense you’re not in the mood to talk, they don’t push.
- They don’t pressure you to share things before you’re ready.
- They give you space when you need it without making you feel guilty.
Fake friends often push limits, even in subtle ways, like insisting you go out when you clearly need rest. A real friend knows when to step forward and when to step back.
2. They Let You Shine Without Feeling Threatened
A real friend doesn’t just say they’re happy for you—they show it.
Here’s the difference:
- They ask about your success days or weeks later, not just in the moment.
- They don’t suddenly distance themselves when things go well for you.
- They never turn your win into a competition.
A fake friend might act supportive but secretly feel jealous or try to downplay your achievements. A real friend celebrates your success like it’s their own.
3. They Don’t Just Apologize—They Change
Everyone makes mistakes, but a true friend proves their apology through actions, not just words.
For example:
- If they hurt your feelings, they make an effort not to do it again.
- If they always cancel plans, they start showing up.
- If they overstep a boundary, they remember it next time.
Fake friends say “I’m sorry” to keep the peace, but nothing ever changes. A real friend proves they care by learning from their mistakes.
4. They Can Handle Disagreements Without Disappearing
Not all friendships are smooth 100% of the time. But a real friend doesn’t run away the moment things get tough.
For example:
- If you have a disagreement, they don’t give you the silent treatment.
- They’re willing to talk things out instead of just cutting you off.
- They don’t make you feel like one argument will end the friendship.
Fake friends often ghost or distance themselves after small conflicts. A true friend values the relationship enough to work through problems.
5. They Remember the “Little Things” That Matter to You
Anyone can remember your birthday, but a real friend remembers the small details.
For example:
- They remember you love a specific coffee order and surprise you with it.
- They check in about something you mentioned in passing weeks ago.
- They send you a song or meme that reminds them of your conversations.
Fake friends only half-listen. But real friends store those little details because they truly care.
6. They Defend You Even When You’re Not Around
A true test of friendship? What they say about you when you’re not in the room.
- A real friend shuts down gossip about you.
- They don’t laugh at jokes made at your expense.
- They stand up for you, even when it’s inconvenient.
Fake friends might join in on negative talk or stay silent to avoid confrontation. A real friend protects your name like they would their own.
7. They Support Your Growth, Even If It Means Change
A real friend wants to see you grow, even if it means your life is changing.
For example:
- They encourage you to take new opportunities, even if it means less time together.
- They don’t hold you back out of selfishness.
- They evolve with you instead of resenting your growth.
Fake friends might feel threatened when you improve your life because they fear being left behind. A true friend will cheer you on, no matter what.
8. They’re Honest—Even When It’s Hard
A real friend isn’t afraid to tell you the truth, even when it’s not what you want to hear.
- They’ll tell you if you’re making a mistake in a relationship or decision.
- They’re honest, but never in a way that’s cruel.
- They care more about your well-being than just telling you what you want to hear.
Fake friends avoid honesty to keep things easy. A true friend will have the tough conversations because they genuinely care.
9. They Reach Out Just Because—Not Just When They Need Something
A true friend checks in just to see how you’re doing, not only when they need a favor.
- They send a message just to say “thinking of you.”
- They don’t only appear when they need advice, money, or support.
- They make an effort to maintain the friendship, even in busy times.
Fake friends tend to only show up when it benefits them. A real friend values you for who you are, not what you can give.
10. They Make Life Lighter, Not Heavier
The biggest test of all? Pay attention to how you feel around them.
- Do you feel at ease, or do you feel drained?
- Do you feel like you can be yourself, or do you have to filter everything?
- Do you leave conversations feeling uplifted, or exhausted?
Real friendship should bring joy, safety, and support—not stress, pressure, or anxiety.
The Bottom Line How Do You Know When Someone Is a Real Friend or Not? 10 Unusual Signs to Watch For: Trust the Signs
Friendship isn’t about how long you’ve known someone—it’s about how they treat you. If someone shows up in these ten ways, they’re a real friend. If they don’t, it may be time to rethink their role in your life. The right people will always make you feel valued, safe, and supported. Those are the friendships worth keeping.
Join us on this journey of self-discovery, empowerment, and celebration! Here’s to strong women – may we know them, may we be them, may we inspire them!
With love and inspiration,
Women on Topp Magazine
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